ONE TOUGH CHICK.

There is nothing more emotionally excruciating than doctors telling you how serious your daughters condition is. Even at my lowest point (the day I was diagnosed with breast cancer), I now realise I was higher, much higher than I have been this week.

When last I wrote we were in hospital awaiting surgery Friday. Our poor girl fasted for 17 hours before her surgery was cancelled. We needed patience, lots of it. Someone else's life needed to be saved. It could easily have been us so we had to be patient.

Then it was weekend. One very sick young woman. Two very worried parents and three days to wait. Three days which seemed to go for an eternity.

Monday surgery finally arrived and she was in theatre for five hours. I counted every minute of the five hours and was physically and mentally exhausted at the end. The husband and I have our little spot we wait in. Its like our own house in the hospital with TV, toilet, water fountain and electricity to charge phones. All we need.

Then came Tuesday and a mammoth nine hours in surgery, with three doctors working on her and only her all day. I thank God for such expertise, such skill and such wisdom. I thank God we live in this country were these services and people can be accessed.

We spent the day pacing the hospital. We drank coffee, we ate hospital burgers (again) and we talked, prayed, begged and waited and waited and waited. I spent time in the hospital chapel where I petitioned every saint Ive ever heard of to intercede for us with God. I even tried bargaining with St Anthony. He is so good at finding stuff that I suggested he branch out and try something new. I want to lose something and I want to lose it permanently from my daughters brain. I want to lose her fistula.

Tuesday was full of emotions. We had a moment of laughter when I told the chaplain about my plan for St Anthony. At one stage I even had a bit of a shock when I realised that sitting at an adjacent table was an old boyfriend from 24 years ago. Is it normal to still feel such dislike after all this time?...but I digress.

And now its Wednesday. Its today.

I'm scared of what we will find after 14 hours in surgery. But I forget whom I'm dealing with. She is sitting up in bed with good colour and a smile on her face. She is awake, not sleeping and this in itself  is a huge improvement. This is one tough chick. How can someone look this good and still have such a serious condition?

Her resilience is unbelievable. I miss her doctor's visit but she tells me he high fived her. He would be pleased today. But there will still be more surgery Friday. Looks are deceiving and scans tell the full story.

We are exhausted beyond belief. Thank you for the ongoing support and love.

Till next time xxx