NOT A POET AND I KNOW IT

I want to scream

I want to shout

I want to let frustration out.

I want to cry
I want to yell
I WANT MY DAUGHTER TO BE WELL

I want some things to go our way

I want to have a peaceful day

I want to find a lucky clover 

I want this nightmare to be OVER! 

Ok. No need to tell me I'm not a poet. I know! But it's the first thing that came out when I put finger to ipad. I am frustrated beyond belief because I had such hopes for Ashton returning to theatre this Friday. I had high hopes for a little bit of finality, a little bit of closure. But if was not to be. There are not enough beds available and no room on the lists for the procedure to happen this Friday.

So, there will be more waiting and more hoping and more praying that her current good health stays with us. We will distract ourselves with thoughts of her 21st party which is scheduled for the end of this month. And I will distract myself with menus, balloons, gifts, cake and an increasing guest list. This is going to be a great party, not just for the birthday girl but for all of us. Everyone on both sides of the family needs a good party.

Waiting is not something I'm accustomed to when it comes to health issues. Luckily I have always had private health cover and been able to choose my own specialist and be seen quickly. But Ashton's treatments have been in the public system because for her condition that's the best place to be. And so we are constrained by lists and budgets and beds and availability of staff etc. It's not fair is it? It's bad enough having any medical condition, without having all that put on you as well. I wonder if people who allocate budgets have ever had to wait for medical treatment before. Bad enough if it was for me...hell that it's for my child. And double hell if that's the only system you can afford to be seen under.

The husband has returned to Geraldton to replenish the bank account. It's hard being separated like this but Ashton can't drive herself at the moment and so I stay. Ciara starts university next week! Sound the trumpets and blow the horns. It's going to be another big year for my budding actress as she undertakes a certificate 4 in musical theatre at WAAPA - the west australian academy of performing arts based at Edith Cowan university.

Till next time...xxx

ST