HAPPY 21st TO MY F.E.D

Twenty one years ago I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. She gave me quite a shock because she arrived five weeks and one day too early on a very humid night. When I woke her father at 11 pm to tell him my waters had broken, he didn't believe me at first. But he had no choice really and soon we were flying out the door to the hospital. We were so young and so naive and so inexperienced that we forgot to take a bag of anything with us. You know what I mean - clothes, toiletries, baby stuff! We had nothing with us. Looking back now it was hilarious!

That night a new midwife was doing her first shift in a new country hospital. She was told to expect a quiet night for her first night and within two hours she got an emergency. I remember her ringing the doctor who was not too pleased to be woken up. Apparently she made the huge mistake of ringing the doctor before examining me herself. The poor woman got yelled at but there was no doubt my baby was on its way, so she managed to squirrel out of any more doctor tongue lashings.

Like her sister two and a bit years later, she was too early to be delivered in a country town hospital and the Royal Flying Doctor plane had to come up from Perth to get me. Ashton was born the following day at 2.59 pm in between calls to my closest girlfriends.I have never seen such a look of delight on my husband's face as I saw that day.

The feeling of holding your first baby in your arms is quite inexplicable. The sudden rush of love
Iand wonder when you look down and finally meet your child can be compared to nothing else. You love all your children equally but the wonder of the first birth is just so special. It was so interesting to read another blogger #Lysa Wilds from #Welcome to My Circus describe exactly the same feelings in her recent post about her son, who coincidentally has a birthday this week too.

My daughter woke up in hospital on her 21 st birthday. She had surgery the day before which did not achieve what it set out to do, so it could have been a downer. But with the help of the nurses, doctors and friends and family we still made the best of the day. Eventually Ashton got discharged and home we went for flowers, cake and visits from family.

The health sagas are not over. We had hoped for the best of 21st presents. We had hoped to be de-fistulised. However, it wasn't to be this time.Once again I thank God for a doctor who knew when to stop rather than take risks.

So now its time to concentrate on a 21st party and on life. She will be reviewed by the doctors in a few months and a new plan of action will be made.We hold our collective breaths but till then life goes on.

Happy birthday to my favourite eldest daughter. 

Till next time...xxx

NOT A POET AND I KNOW IT

I want to scream

I want to shout

I want to let frustration out.

I want to cry
I want to yell
I WANT MY DAUGHTER TO BE WELL

I want some things to go our way

I want to have a peaceful day

I want to find a lucky clover 

I want this nightmare to be OVER! 

Ok. No need to tell me I'm not a poet. I know! But it's the first thing that came out when I put finger to ipad. I am frustrated beyond belief because I had such hopes for Ashton returning to theatre this Friday. I had high hopes for a little bit of finality, a little bit of closure. But if was not to be. There are not enough beds available and no room on the lists for the procedure to happen this Friday.

So, there will be more waiting and more hoping and more praying that her current good health stays with us. We will distract ourselves with thoughts of her 21st party which is scheduled for the end of this month. And I will distract myself with menus, balloons, gifts, cake and an increasing guest list. This is going to be a great party, not just for the birthday girl but for all of us. Everyone on both sides of the family needs a good party.

Waiting is not something I'm accustomed to when it comes to health issues. Luckily I have always had private health cover and been able to choose my own specialist and be seen quickly. But Ashton's treatments have been in the public system because for her condition that's the best place to be. And so we are constrained by lists and budgets and beds and availability of staff etc. It's not fair is it? It's bad enough having any medical condition, without having all that put on you as well. I wonder if people who allocate budgets have ever had to wait for medical treatment before. Bad enough if it was for me...hell that it's for my child. And double hell if that's the only system you can afford to be seen under.

The husband has returned to Geraldton to replenish the bank account. It's hard being separated like this but Ashton can't drive herself at the moment and so I stay. Ciara starts university next week! Sound the trumpets and blow the horns. It's going to be another big year for my budding actress as she undertakes a certificate 4 in musical theatre at WAAPA - the west australian academy of performing arts based at Edith Cowan university.

Till next time...xxx

ST

JUST A LOAD OF NONSENSE 2

Please re read the blog JUST A LOAD OF NONSENSE before reading the following. Otherwise IT WONT MAKE SENSE!!!

                                              A NAUGHTY BRAIN ( chapter 2)

When last we met, Kate was not a very happy girl because her naughty brain was needing a good smack.

Dr Hot Stuff said he would have another go at fixing Kate's brain.

Kate was happy.

She liked Dr Hot Stuff even though once he made her cry.

Kate's mummy said she had to forgive him, because his hair was out of place that day and that probably made him grumpy.

Kate promised  she would rest a lot and get better so that Dr Hot Stuff could fix her brain.

She tried very very hard but got sicker and sicker.

Kate's face got whiter and whiter.

She slept and slept so much she missed Home and Away on TV

Kate's sister was worried because normal people did not miss Home and Away.

Kate's sister took her to see Dr Vitamins. 

Dr Vitamins  gave Kate some lollies to make her feel better.

They did not work.

Kate's mummy was angry and wanted to tell Dr Vitamins what she could do with her lollies.

Kate's mummy rang up Dr Hot Stuff for help.

He said to bring Kate back to hospital.

A hospital is a place where people get sick because they can't find parking.

Sometimes they also fix brains in hospitals.

                                                           

In the hospital Dr Med Student was learning how to become a doctor.

Kate's mummy was annoyed.
She wanted Dr Hot Stuff or Dr Papa Bear but Dr Know it all said we had to wait for Dr Med student to decide what to do!

Kate's mummy was getting impatient and grumpy.

Kate was sick and Dr Med Student was taking too long. Dr Know it all listened to Dr Med Student and eventually rang Dr Hot Stuff.

This took three hours.

Kate's mummy could have told them what to do in five minutes.

Poor Kate was very sad.

She didn't like hospitals.

To make things worse,Dr Sexy Pants had left since her last visit AND

Dr Papa Bear was missing in action.

This was not a good sign.

Kate was not happy.

Dr Bertie Beetle came to visit Kate the following day.

He had a big smile and said he would help fix her naughty brain.

Kate was pleased but started to wonder if Dr Papa Bear was on holidays with Dr Sexy Pants.

Nurse Smiley came to get Kate ready.

Kate loved Nurse Smiley because she told her stories about food.

Kate was always hungry when Nurse Smiley was around.

Then a very good thing happened!

Dr Papa Bear walked into the room.

He was going to help Dr Hot Stuff and Dr Bertie Beetle fix Kate's brain.

Kate was so happy that she let Dr Another bloody anaesthetist put her to sleep.

The doctors got to work.

They wanted to fix Kate's naughty brain.

They wanted to give Kate's brain a good smack.

To be continued...

JUST A LOAD OF NONSENSE

My mother keeps suggesting that the FED writes a children's book. Maybe it could go something like this:
                                        A NAUGHTY BRAIN

Once upon a time there was a young woman called Kate. Unfortunately Kate was not well and had to go to hospital.
A big ambulance took Kate to hospital but Dr Useless said there was nothing wrong with her and sent her home.
Kate was very sad and got sicker and sicker.
Kate's mummy got very worried and took her back to the hospital.

Dr Useless knew better than to mess with Kate's mummy so Dr Cleverboy took over.
Dr Cleverboy said there was a problem with Kate's brain and that she needed to go and see a doctor in the big city.

Kate was very worried but her mummy and daddy said not to worry because the doctor in the big city would fix it.
The doctor in the big city was Dr Papa Bear. He fixed Kate's brain and made her better.
Kate was very happy.
Kate's mummy and daddy were very happy too.

Christmas holidays came and Kate missed her sister who was away on a big aeroplane.
Kate counted down the days till her sister came home and they could play house together again.

Then Kate got sick again and had to go back to hospital.
Kate was worried because Dr Papa Bear was on holidays. Who would fix her brain now?
Dr Hot Stuff and Dr Sexy Pants said they could fix her brain and so Kate let them have a go.
They did a good job but they were worried that Kate would get sick again.
Kate was worried too.

Dr Hot Stuff rang Dr Try to fix it.
He said he would try to fix Kate's brain but he would need to drill a hole in her head.
Kate wasn't very happy about this.
Dr Hot Stuff wasn't very happy about this.
Kate's mummy and daddy were also not happy about this.
But they had no choice.

Dr Try to fix it did his best but Kate's brain was being very naughty.
Dr Try to fix it was so upset he changed his name to Dr Didn't fix it and left the country.


Kate's brain was still being naughty so everyone decided to ring up Dr Hot Stuff again.
He said he would have another go and fix Kate's brain.

Kate was very happy.


To be continued...

INTRODUCING ASHTON- GUEST BLOGGER

I stare into the bright light above me.

I seem to find this light intriguing for some reason. Is it a camera protecting me? Is it a metaphorical sign that God is looking down and more importantly looking after me?

Outside there is the shuffling of feet moving from one end of the room to the other, attending to call bells that pierce the air when they sound. Someone would think that a large medical emergency has occurred.  The lady across from me is barking madly and I pray to the light that her germs aren’t energized enough to reach me.

I resort back to my mate the “light” and converse with it. In my post anaesthetic state I utter a simple, “hi how you doing?”

A response might have been nice Mr Light.

***

Dear Reader,

You probably think I’ve gone crazy. Please allow me to explain myself

My name is Ashton (you know me as the FED) and I have a brain that doesn’t work.   

I have what is known as a dural fistula, an abnormal direct connection between an artery and a vein. And there are many of these abnormal connections in my brain. I am clogged up there like a big clump of spaghetti. This has led to one of the sinuses in my head being blocked off because the blood has not been able to drain back and through my head properly.

In the last eight months, I’ve been through seven embolisations to separate the fistula, have been seen by 10 different doctors (one of whom doesn’t know that we are secretly married), spent over two months in hospitals, 49 hours of surgery and God knows how many blood tests.

I’m known as an abnormal case (no surprises there.) Something such as a dural fistula is not common in healthy 20 years olds but more common in those in their 60’s and 70’s.

“Twenty years olds should be out living their lives!” one doctor exclaimed to me.

It has been overwhelming. There’s no question about it.  It takes a toll on not just your confidence and well being, but also the people around you.

People have always told me that there will be events in life that will make you grow as a person. To go through adversity such as what I’ve gone through makes you look at life in a different way. It makes you appreciate your life. It teaches you to fulfill every moment.

I’ve never been so grateful for the love and kindness I’ve received from people such as the nurses who will offer you a Milo to help you feel as comfortable as possible. Or the doctors who have been so  gifted with the ability to help improve the health and wellbeing of other people and yet still have time for a chat.

I’ve had well wishes from England to America and Malta to Saudi Arabia. People everywhere have been letting me know that they are thinking of me and praying for me. How lucky we are to exercise our ability to pray.

So please forgive me for talking nonsense to bright lights, and thinking that they will talk back to me.  I do have more surgery planned for Friday next week. It’s hoped that this will end all the long procedures that I’ve had and hopefully let me return to living my life… with a new found gratefulness and a mantra of "living life to the full."

PS. The jury is still out as to whether there is a connection between my condition and Mum's condition of Cowden's Syndrome. At the moment, we will just deal with one thing at a time.